10 Terrible Titles I’ve Kindly Rewritten For Us All

Last week we got to see all the titles I love. This week’s Top Ten Tuesday is all about titles I would rewrite, and I can confirm it’s way more fun to complain than begrudgingly admit a title is good.

Harry Potter is not actually on the list but Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire should definitely have been called Harry Potter Fights a Dragon, we all know why we loved that book.

How to Stop Time

1 Fundamentally the book does not tell me how to stop time so really, it’s not a great title.

My Rename: Living Forever Kinda Sucks


The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue

2 Again, not a fan of the guide book type titles. My name, on the other hand, gets straight to the point.

My Rename: The Tour that Goes Wrong


Finale

3 I knew it was the Finale of the series, I didn’t need a title for that. My title is attempting is much more to the point while still keeping the one worded theme they’ve got going on.

My Rename: Fated


Red Queen

4 I would hardly call Mare a queen. Although, admittedly, my title could do with being a little more punchy. It’s a work in progress.

My Rename: A Mess of a Human Being Gets Magic and is Surrounded by Sinister Forces


A Heart so Fierce and Broken

5 How is the sequel to A Curse so Dark and Lonely not called A Heart so Fierce and Fragile?! Because they both begin with F, while Broken begins with a B but they both imply the same thing. Urg.

My Rename: A Heart so Fierce and Fragile


Blue Lily, Lily Blue

6 Ok, yes, it’s in the song but it’s not exactly central to the plot. And this really made me think Blue was secretly called Lily or it was something relating to the auras or whatever. But no, it’s just a slightly annoying song. Also it doesn’t even fit with the other titles, with the whole three words, one of them The etc etc.

My Rename: The Tone-Deaf Enchantress


Vicious

7 What does this even mean?! It’s just an adjective. Half the protagonist I read could be summed up as Vicious. My title may be a Pirates of the Caribbean quote but how well does it fit here!

My Rename: The Dichotomy of Good and Evil


Vox

8 I am yet to understand this title. Is that what the arm devices were called? Is it some combination of the word Voice Box? Please explain. I think my title is way better since it’s a great play on the shocking situation. Hahaha.

My Rename: Lost for Words


Series of Unfortunate Events: The End

9 I know it’s the end Snicket I’ve been reading all 13 🙄 just because the series is finishing doesn’t mean you can cop out on a decent name. I was sort of going with some alliteration since, you know, The Bad Beginning was how it all began. And Inevitable is pretty Sinister.

My Rename: Series of Unfortunate Events: The Inevitable Ending


The Hazel Wood

X Did that wood even include hazel trees?! It was hardly a key plot point of the wood.

My Rename: The Misunderstood, Spooky and Somewhat Soul Destroying Wood


Let’s Compare Notes

So there you have it! 10 titles I would rename. What do you think? Do you like any names I’ve provided? Have a list of your own? Would love to hear from you in the comments section!